There was a time when I felt completely stuck.
I woke up every day with heaviness in my chest. I doubted my own choices, second-guessed everything I said, and believed that maybe life had already passed me by. I smiled in front of others, but inside I felt like I was just surviving, not living.
If that sounds familiar, I want you to know this: you’re not alone.
What helped me wasn’t a big breakthrough or a dramatic moment. It was a small shift. Tiny changes in the way I thought. The kind that sneak in quietly but end up changing everything. I want to share five of those shifts with you, because maybe they’ll help you too.
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I Stopped Trying to Be “Fixed”
For a long time, I thought I was broken. I thought I needed to be fixed, like there was something wrong with me. But healing doesn’t mean becoming someone else. It means becoming more of who you already are.
Once I let go of the idea that I had to “fix” myself, I started giving myself grace. I started treating myself like someone worth being kind to. That was the real beginning of change.
You’re not broken. You’re growing.
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I Realized That Thoughts Are Not Facts
My mind used to tell me all kinds of harsh things:
- You’re not good enough.
- You’ll never get it right.
Everyone else has it figured out but you.
And I believed those thoughts for years. Until I started questioning them.
Just because a thought pops up doesn’t make it true. It took practice, but eventually I learned to pause, breathe, and respond with curiosity instead of panic. Now when my mind tells me something painful, I ask: Is this helpful? Is this true?
Not every voice in your head deserves your attention.
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I Learned That Rest is Not Laziness
I used to feel guilty for resting. If I sat down, I felt lazy. If I slowed down, I felt behind.
But burnout taught me something valuable: rest is not the enemy. In fact, rest is part of the work. You can’t grow if you’re always running on empty.
Now I schedule in breaks the way I schedule tasks. I’ve learned that slowing down doesn’t mean giving up. It means refuelling.
You’re allowed to rest. Your worth isn’t measured by how busy you are.
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I Started Speaking to Myself Like Someone I Love
Imagine talking to a child the way we often talk to ourselves:
- You’re stupid.
- You’ll never get this right.
Why are you always messing things up?
It would break their spirit.
So I started catching those moments and choosing kinder words. Not fake praise, but real, gentle encouragement. Like: “I’m doing my best.” or “It’s okay to make mistakes.”
The way we talk to ourselves becomes our inner environment. And I wanted mine to feel safe.
If you wouldn’t say it to someone you love, don’t say it to yourself.
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I Gave Myself Permission to Start Small
For years, I waited for motivation. I waited to feel ready. But that moment rarely came.
What finally worked was giving myself permission to take small steps. One page, one deep breath, and one kind action. Even if it felt silly, and even if it felt like it wasn’t enough.
Small steps might not look impressive, but they build momentum. And momentum creates change.
You don’t have to take huge leaps. Just don’t stop moving.
In summary
These shifts didn’t change my life overnight. But they created space. Space for healing. Space for hope. Space for a version of me I actually enjoy living with.
Maybe that’s what you need too, not a big fix, but a little space.
So if you’ve been feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or not enough, I see you. Start small, be kind, and keep going.
You’re already doing better than you think.